Baring my heart.

Mysterious as the dark side of the moon.

Tag: revelation

Raised hands, not weapons, win the battles

This was my photo for Friday, September 11 (what a date), 2009, which was day 3 of my Project:

Exodus 17:8-16

What was so significant about that day that I would post a photo of my Bible and notebook for the Project? An encounter with God happened.

I’m 3 weeks into my fast and I’ve found that while the first 2 weeks were pretty easy, the third (this past week) wasn’t. And I’ve also learned, through accountability with other girls at GFRESH, that it’s when you’re doing your best that the Enemy will work harder to attack you and bring you down.

By the end of the week, I felt so unworthy to face God, that I was actually relieved that I wasn’t scheduled to be up for worship at GFRESH. I didn’t want to be up on the stage playing piano for a King that I wasn’t worthy to face. I felt dirty and useless — but a King’s court is spotlessly clean, and He only has courtiers that are there to serve and submit to Him.

During worship, God pressed the above passage — Exodus 17:8-16 — onto my heart:

     8 The Amalekites came and attacked the Israelites at Rephidim. 9 Moses said to Joshua, “Choose some of our men and go out to fight the Amalekites. Tomorrow I will stand on top of the hill with the staff of God in my hands.”
     10 So Joshua fought the Amalekites as Moses had ordered, and Moses, Aaron and Hur went to the top of the hill. 11 As long as Moses held up his hands, the Israelites were winning, but whenever he lowered his hands, the Amalekites were winning. 12 When Moses’ hands grew tired, they took a stone and put it under him and he sat on it. Aaron and Hur held his hands up — one on one side, one on the other — so that his hands remained steady till sunset. 13 So Joshua overcame the Amalekite army with the sword.
     14 Then the LORD said to Moses, “Write this on a scroll as something to be remembered and make sure that Joshua hears it, because I will completely blot out the memory of Amalek from under heaven.”
     15 Moses built an altar and called it The LORD is my Banner. 16 He said, “For hands were lifted up to the throne of the LORD. The LORD will be at war against the Amalekites from generation to generation.”

So when we got the chance to sit down, I pulled out my notebook and borrowed a pen from Christine to jot down what God taught me from the story:

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Pick yourself up! …And God will do the rest

If I fall and hurt myself, I’m not going to sit on the ground crying about my pain. I’m not going to complain about my injury, or proclaim to people around me how weak I am. I’m going to want to seek help.

If necessary, I will take medication to heal my pain or to heal my wound. If I need a cast on a broken bone, I will get a cast. If I need a band-aid to cover up a small cut or graze in my skin, I will get a band-aid and put it on. If I need stitches to close up a would in my flesh, I will get those stitches put into place.

As a human being, I am prone to sin. I am vulnerable to tripping over, to falling down, to failing, and to getting hurt. Some of those things I can’t help, but if I do fall, I’m not going to whine or complain about it. I’m not going to declare that, “I, Danica Sevilla, have sinned.” I’m not going to wallow in self pity, or sulk about how I’m useless and worthless.

I’m going to go to God for help. I’m going to read His Word, because it tells me how to heal my wounds, which is through communication with Him, through communion with Him, and through a relationship with Him. I’m going to talk to God about my problems and struggles, rather than going to a person, who is as capable of falling as I am. There’s no reason to ask help of someone who could possibly drag me into their problems and struggles.

Only God — who is completely perfect and sinless, and is stronger than any being on this planet — can be my refuge, my shield, my deliverer from evil, my rescue, my lifesaver, and my hiding place.

“My hiding place, my safe refuge
My treasure Lord, You are
My friend and King, anointed one
Most Holy

Because You’re with me, I will not fear”

From I Will Exalt You by Brooke Fraser/Hillsong

– “Keep moving forward.” – Walt Disney

– –

“Let not the things of this world ever sway me
I’ll run till I finish the race”
Lord Of Lords by Brooke Fraser/Hillsong

 

On the wings of eagles

The year of 2008 was, for Generation FRESH, the year of being Unlimited. It was about having no restrictions, being boundless, and living unrestrained lives for our God. But throughout the year, we found that it was difficult to be more than what we already were, especially when we tried to do it on our own. It was difficult to live unlimited lives when, as humans, we had so many limits.

By the end of the year, we realised that God wasn’t trying to teach us how to be unlimited, but that he was trying to show us how big he was and how small we were compared to him. He was teaching us that he is larger than any of our circumstances, and that we couldn’t be unlimited unless we understood how limited we were.

Even now I’m still learning my limits. I keep trying to do things my own way, and God lets me get far enough to get bruised, just to teach me a lesson. I think it’s my fault for trying to be independent.

I think today was a bit of a turning point. I say “a bit” because I had the opportunity to take another step forward, but instead, I shied away and thought too much about how wide my stride should be, instead of just putting my foot forward. However, today was a turning point because of something that God was whispering to me during church today. Today’s message didn’t hit me much, but during the altar call I knew God had sent me a wake up call.

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